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Thursday, August 22, 2013

Speak the Truth


Don't we all love a good friend that speaks truth into our lives? 


Whether it is feedback on big life changing decisions to 'does this dress look right?', 

we all want an honest answer!  

You know you have a good solid relationship when you can turn to this person for the truth.


However, sometimes we forget the last part of sharing the truth....
to speak it with LOVE.

Somewhere along the way, I think I have lost my empathy...

  • My husband complains of a headache, I ask, 'have you taken any medicine? If not, quit complaining.
  • Someone falls down, I say, 'get yourself up already'
  • Someone gets hurt, I ask, 'are you bleeding or dying. If the answer is no to both- we are good to go!
  • My kids say they are tired, I say, 'Go to bed and quit whining!


It seems simple enough to me, if you have a problem, fix it and go on with life.

However, I realize that this response 
is not responding in LOVE.


Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, (Ephesians 4:15 ESV)

So, I thought I would throw out some 'hypothetical' situations...

  • You wake your son up at the early hour of 6am. You joyfully sing the Rise and Shine song. 
His response: to the same tune of the song, 'I'm going to punch someone in the face' 
Hmm, not a morning person.  
Speaking the truth IN LOVE: 'Mom, I need 5 more minutes please' 


  • You just finish dinner and you have friends arriving soon. You turn to your husband and ask if you have something in your teeth. After all, you just got done eating corn on the cob. 
His response: You look like you have been grazing through the corn field. 
Nice. Great honesty there, good for a laugh, I suppose...
Speaking the truth IN LOVE: Yes, I think you need to look in the mirror. You might want a toothpick or brush your teeth. 


  • You go out into the garage and your husband is doing various handyman chores. You stand there idly watching. You ask what he wants to do today since it is Saturday- family day, you know what I'm saying here?!
His response: Why don't you do something productive, like go to the store? 
Wow, that was nice feedback. Not going there...
Speaking the truth IN LOVE: I would like to get some chores done this morning and do something with the family this afternoon. Do you want to go to the store while I finish up? 


  • My son brings me his worksheet after 2 minutes of diligently working and says, 'I'm done!'  
My response: No you aren't, did you even flip it over, there is a back side here. Sit yourself back down and finish. 
Speaking the truth IN LOVE: Let's take a look together and see if you finished both sides. If not, you will need to finish your work. (still working on that one...)

These are all hypothetical situations of course 
but definitely got me thinking about 
where my heart is when I respond to others. 

Lord, let no corrupt take utter from my mouth, 
but only words to build up and encourage others, 
and extend grace to those around me. 


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